Just the other day two more messages popped into my inbox. Each of them reminded me that if I didn’t get up to speed on their latest “as a Service” offering, I’d somehow be relegated to the dustbin of Internet history.

Oh, really.

I don’t even remember which “as a Service” these hucksters were hawking. For those of you who may be unfamiliar with what “as a Service” means (and woe to you, poor clueless clods), it is defined in Wikipedia (”Dictionary as a Service,” I would imagine) as...